Stop Playing the Blame Game
In our last newsletter, I talked about why many couples leave the “house” and go out to the “playground” of relationships. The problem is that there is seldom a playground monitor, and, by the time that there is one present, it is usually in the form of a judge.
One of the games that couples start to play is what I call the “blame game”. Unfortunately, there are never any winners, yet couples relentlessly play it over and over and over again. It hasn’t worked to produce any winners in thousands of years, yet couples are willingly going into overtime thinking that they will be the first to win.
The fact is, each person in a marital relationship holds a great deal of power to put a halt to much of the conflict that is in their marriage. It is vitally important for each (or at least one) of the participants to look at their own faults instead of simply looking at the faults of the other person. I must say, we have a high rate of success when it comes to helping couples, and the ones that “get it” are the ones that stop playing the blame game, and take that same energy and work on their own stuff.
After six months of marriage, I thought that I had married the wrong person, however, as I pursued a better relationship with my wife, I was amazed to see that I was the primary source of irritation to the marriage. During our first year of marriage, my wife’s spirit was wilted and dry, however, as I changed, it was amazing to see her open up to me as a flower does in the morning sun.
Mark it down, the blame game will do nothing to help your marriage. It only fuels the fires of anger, bitterness, rage, and unforgiveness.
Watch this Short Video to See if Your Marriage May be Caught in the Cycle of Resentment and Anger
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