Pornography – Wife Caught Her Husband Using Pornography
The Following is an Answer to a Question from a Wife that Caught Her Husband Using Pornography (Porn)
Question:
“I caught my husband using pornography last week. I really don’t know which way to turn or what to do at this point?”
Answer:
Unfortunately, Internet abetted pornography has become the leading cause of marriage problems and divorce. At this point, there are a few things that you should know:
1. Your husband’s problem with pornography is not about you. Remember, lust is like a fire. The more you feed it, the more it craves. At some point, your husband started to kindle a little fire of lust. Unfortunately, the more he fed that fire, the more it craved.
Just so you know, if you gave a man that is hooked on pornography ten of the most beautiful models in the world as girlfriends, at some point, he would still be as unsatisfied as ever. Rest assured, his problems with lust and pornography are not about your looks, your waist line, nor the amount of sex that you have provided for him.
2. Your husband needs forgiveness, however, forgiveness does not mean that you lose all sense. In other words, if he has truly repented, he still needs some type of accountability in his life. In fact, accountability is a huge factor for men that are making attempts at “staying clean”.
This accountability may be administered in a variety of ways:
A. Get an Internet block on the your computer. They typically cost about $4 or $5 per month. Keep in mind, however, that they are not fool-proof.
B. Your husband should allow you to look into the history folder in his computer.
C. The computer should be moved to a central spot in your house.
D. Your husband should allow you to check his email accounts or his cell phone usage.
E. If need be, throw the computer and the television out of your home. Sorry, I know it sounds extreme, but tough habits sometimes require extreme measures. You make the call.
Of course, I am not asking you to become the “Gestapo”, but, if your husband truly means business, then he should be willing to earn your trust back.
3. You should possess a spirit of forgiveness toward your husband. You may want to search the rest of our site to read previous articles and answers about forgiveness.
4. Your husband probably needs some type of outside help. Sorry, but most people don’t figure out life on their own.
5. Usually, a marriage that has been infected by pornography has bad ingredients that need to be replaced with good ingredients. Although your husband needs to accept full responsibility for his actions, it does help all involved if both husband and wife make a commitment to improve their abilities to truly love one another. I would highly recommend our Audio Cd Series called “How to Break the Cycle of Resentment in a Marriage”. This Cd Series features our Proven, 2-Step Process that we walk couples through on a weekly basis. For ordering info., Click Here.
Watch this Short Video to See if Your Marriage May be Caught in the Cycle of Resentment and Anger
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